with my eyes closed
by beastofeden
Summary: Edward moves to NYC and is new on the prep school scene. Bella is beautiful and enigmatic mystery. Can he save her from herself or will he fall down the rabbit hole with her?


I wrote the first chapter of this story over a year ago and never followed through on it. I've been back in the twilight game after seeing new Moon and was looking through my files and found this and read it over and started writing it again. i have few chapters written already so those should be out fairly quickly but do not expect updates to be super frequent. PLEASE review and tell me what you think. Also, if anyone was bored/interested enough to make me a banner...that would be tiiiiiight.

WARNING: This story WILL contain underage drinking and drug use, and also sex probably (no lemons though, I can;t write them for shit. i start giggling and get uncomfortable). If you're not down with that, move on.

The story title comes from the song by The Raveonettes. its awesome and totally captures the mood of this story. Chapter title comes from another Raveonette's song.

DISCLAIMER: I OWN NOTHING. All recognizable character's are property of S. Meyer and Summit. Don't sue me, I own nothing but too many books, too much music and a '91 Chevy Blazer.

* * *

The first time he saw her was at a party. Fitting, he would later acknowledge.

Edward Cullen had just moved to New York from Washington State. His father, world renowned surgeon Carlisle Cullen, had taken an extremely lucrative job offer at New York Presbyterian and decided to uproot his family and move them to the other end of the country. Edward had lived all his life on the outskirts of a small town and was now expected to live in Manhattan, a teeming metropolis of millions? He was no hick but it was nonetheless quite a change.

Edward had always been somewhat of a loner. In the small town he had grown up in he was an oddity. Extremely wealthy, highly intelligent but anti-social to the extreme, he had never had many friends growing up, instead socializing mostly with his siblings. He had not gone to many (really any) parties since the invitations switched from cards with cartoons to text messages. His sister Alice, however, _lived_ for parties. It remained a mystery to Edward how she had been invited to this one, when they had started school Thursday and it was now Saturday.

He had not wanted to come. He would have been happy to stay at home, listening to a depressing playlist and trying to figure out the subway system (was there really a Z train?) but Alice had begged and pleaded and threatened. Didn't he want to make some friends in their new home? Would one night out really kill him? His mental answers were no and possibly, but after hours of whining and the onset of a migraine, he had given in. He drew the line at allowing her to dress him, though.

So that's how he found himself in a humongous loft somewhere in the Village…or was it Chelsea…Soho, maybe…and what did Soho even stand for? As soon as they had arrived his siblings had left him, Alice rushing to say hello to the girl who had invited her tonight and Emmet to bump fists with the members of the lacrosse team he would no doubt be joining very soon. Edward wandered, snagging a beer at some point which he had sipped all of three times, alternating between sitting in a corner and standing in a corner. And then he saw her.

A light had flashed to the bar, which stood, inexplicably, in the dead center of the room. During the past hour a few girls had swayed on it drunkenly, only to fall into the eager arms of one of the many waiting, generically handsome boys. This girl was different, his eyes snapped to her immediately and he couldn't look away.

She stood on the bar alone, clad in a short purple party dress, one which Alice would no doubt covet if she did not already own it. The length (or lack thereof) left miles of her creamy pale legs exposed. She was barefoot, which was brave considering the floor of the loft was covered in years of party residue. Her long brown hair was loose, flying wildly around her head as she danced to the music. Her moves were not the same generically whorish ones copied by girls from Britney videos. He didn't know how he knew it, but this girl was simply enjoying herself, moving to the music and letting her body do what it wanted. She was magnificent.

Her head turned in his direction and he caught a glimpse of the most exquisite face he had ever seen. Heart shaped and lovely, with full pink lips and large doe eyes. His heart thudded in his chest and he licked his suddenly dry lips, wondering how a face so perfect could exist. He thought her eyes, the color of which he could not tell when he was so far away and it was so dark, might have caught his for a moment but he wasn't sure. All too soon the lights direction moved and his goddess was lost to him. He kept his eyes locked on the same spot for a few minutes, but when the bar lit up again there was nothing on top of it but half empty bottles.

"Got a light?"

And there she was, standing next to him, a cigarette dangling form her dainty fingers and a knowing smirk on her lips. He looked into her eyes, knowing she had asked a question but he had no answer, no voice, no idea what to do. Her smile grew wider and she reached into some hidden pocket of her dress, pulling out a lighter and touching the flame to her cigarette. Edward coughed awkwardly and asked, "If you had that, why'd you ask me for a light?"

Her smile grew impossibly wider and she answered, "I'm Bella."

He didn't care that she hadn't answered his question, the information she had given was much more important. "Edward," he responded raising his hand to shake hers. Her smile grew larger still as she raised her hand to shake his. When their palms met, a spark of electricity shocked Edward and he could tell from the look in her eyes that she had felt it too.

They disengaged (Edward somewhat unwillingly) and Bella brought the cigarette to her mouth, inhaling for a few moments and then letting out a stream of smoke. "So, Edward," she said, tapping ash onto the floor, "I've never seen you at a party before. Where do you go to school?"

He watched as she took another drag, eyes lingering on the way her perfect lips closed around the cigarette. "Dalton. And um, I just moved here. That's why you, uh, haven't seen me before."

She ran a hand through her hair, tousling the wild locks, making her look even more gorgeous. "That makes sense. The private school scene is pretty small and inclusive, everyone knows everyone. How are you liking it so far?"

He had no time to think of a polite response, the kind that he had given to every other person who'd asked him this question. "I don't. Like it, I mean. Everyone is so caught up in their money and parties and gossip. It seems incredibly superficial." He cursed himself inwardly. She looked exactly like the rest of the New York girls he had met so far. Exceedingly more beautiful, to be sure, but she was probably just like the rest of them and wouldn't take his comment well. She surprised him however, by laughing. Her laugh was deep and throaty, sexy as hell. She took another drag from her cigarette.

"Keen eye, Edward. It _is_ incredibly superficial. We're all a bunch of spoiled rich fuckers with nothing better to do than drink and drug ourselves stupid, talk shit about each other and swipe our credit cards at Barney's." She dropped her cigarette onto the floor, not bothering to put it out. She looked into his eyes, still smiling that Cheshire cat grin. He opened his mouth to say something else, to apologize, to ask her more about herself, anything, when a voice cried, "Bella!"

They both looked over. A gorgeous blonde was feet away, waving at Bella, looking pissed as hell. Bella raised her eyebrow questioningly and the blonde spat out, "Lauren decided to drink a bottle of Ketel One instead of the Poland Spring I gave her. She's passed out in the bathroom. I swear, this is the last time she rolls at a party. Assistance please." She turned, stalking toward the bathroom. Bella turned to Edward, her smile now and exasperated smirk. She leaned in, kissed him gently on the cheek and whispered "Nice meeting you, Edward. See you around," before turning and heading in the direction her friend had left.

He stared off the way she had gone for a few minutes, dazed, his cheek burning from the contact of her lips. _Bella_. His mind had no idea how to explain or understand her, to rationalize the existence of this beautiful, enigmatic girl.

He stayed in that spot for another hour, hoping she'd come find him again, but she never reappeared. He had seen a flash of color in the crowd, the deep purple of her dress, but it was lost in the crush of bodies. Finally he gave up, texting Alice to tell her he was leaving with or without her. He made his way outside to wait for his siblings, wrapping his scarf tight around his neck to keep the cold at bay. His gaze traveled across the street and – there it was, that purple dress. Bella was across the street, still barefoot in her tiny dress. He felt a strong, sudden, strange urge of protectiveness, wishing he could wrap a coat around her and take her someplace warm. His bedroom, maybe.

She was standing with some kind of freakishly tall man-boy. While the kid's face was that of a teenager, he was easily 6'5" with russet skin and dark hair. Edward was secure enough in his masculinity to acknowledge that this guy was good looking. He was also angry. He was snarling something at Bella that Edward couldn't hear from across the street, the city sounds of cars and people drowning out what seemed to be a one-sided conversation. While the giant looked enraged, Bella looked almost bored. Apathetic, detached. But now he must have said something she didn't like, because her features sharpened and her eyes turned cold and she spat something at him that seemed to make him deflate. He shook his head at her and led her toward a town car that sat idling on the curb. She didn't resist him and her face switched back into that empty mask.

The guy got into the car first and Bella hesitated before the door and her eyes found Edward's across the street. Her face didn't change but her eyes became almost wistful, sad. She raised her hand to wave at him, gave him a small smile and got into the town car. It pulled away.

Why did he feel like a part of him was going with it?

* * *

Let me know what you think. Loved it, hated it, I want to know.

BTW, there is a Z train.


End file.
